Oops!

Looks like Dementia Don and his crack team of “highly qualified white folks” and a little bit qualified candidates skipped the memo that America has this thing called a Constitution—and, spoiler alert—Greenland isn’t listed on eBay under “For Sale: Island Edition – Pristine Views, Financing Available.”

But hey, if you really want to unleash chaos, just start a rumor that Trump signed an executive order closing all Dollar Stores, the Waffle Houses and limiting Walmart to a single checkout line.

Trust me, millions of his red-hat disciples will be out there faster than you can say “rollback prices,” ready to rage.

Picture it: angry mobs storming Walmarts like it’s the Black Friday apocalypse and staging sit-ins at the now-shuttered Cracker Barrels.

It’ll be mayhem—lawn chairs, MAGA flags, and crockpots flying through the air.

Who knew the revolution would start over discount shampoo and pancake breakfasts?

Will trade a dozen eggs for washer/dryer combo or ride to Gulf Port, Mississippi—Florida resident.